tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post5598652978217168735..comments2023-05-11T10:05:37.318-04:00Comments on Deaf Progressivism: My 93-year-old Grandma’s Sorrow (open-captioned)Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger57125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-26039706715400909732008-07-17T17:13:00.000-04:002008-07-17T17:13:00.000-04:00Ben I'm in the midst of family vacation that was p...Ben I'm in the midst of family vacation that was planned for months. Pls look for my email addy on the right column and reach me.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05468248139421077835noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-63232770074062144142008-07-17T14:45:00.000-04:002008-07-17T14:45:00.000-04:00Hello Barb,If you don't mind, could you e-mail me?...Hello Barb,<BR/><BR/>If you don't mind, could you e-mail me? I would like to discuss something with you of utmost importance and it is not about DBC or Deafhood. <BR/><BR/>I'm very concerned about something that will or is affecting you right now. An email would be appreciated ASAP to take proactive steps towards your protection.<BR/><BR/>mwahs :) This is nothing bad just so you know. I'm not out to argue with you or whatever, I really want you to be on the safe side.<BR/><BR/>Think of this as a peace pipe for this certain situation<BR/><BR/>also can you delete this comment off this posting...it's more for you :)<BR/><BR/>thanks,<BR/><BR/>BenDer Sankthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10850734729005758796noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-10931823902435173552008-05-21T15:39:00.000-04:002008-05-21T15:39:00.000-04:00Excellent Barb! Really love how you put this toget...Excellent Barb! Really love how you put this together and will share with others to watch this too.Sheri A Farinhahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02378210792570566116noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-47319023893011779722008-05-18T21:57:00.000-04:002008-05-18T21:57:00.000-04:00Oh, by the way, your grandmother looked pretty goo...Oh, by the way, your grandmother looked pretty good for her age. She moved her lips very clearly, making it easy for us who can lipread, understand what she said.mishkazenahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07714824721166601510noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-72802380597252789032008-05-18T21:49:00.000-04:002008-05-18T21:49:00.000-04:00This is a very important message that the hearing ...This is a very important message that the hearing parents of deaf babies and toddlers need to hear. Thank you, Barb, for getting your grandmother to share her experience.mishkazenahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07714824721166601510noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-63137849107194399042008-05-18T14:08:00.000-04:002008-05-18T14:08:00.000-04:00I don't think I can say much more than what's alre...I don't think I can say much more than what's already been said here, Barb. This is indeed one of your best posts, and I thank your grandmother for her willingness to come forward and tell it like it is, and I thank you for sharing it with us.<BR/><BR/>My 76 year old mother was told pretty much the same thing when I was a child - that I was "too smart to be sent away to that deaf school, and I would do just fine if kept at home, attended a hearing school, took speech therapy, and was not allowed to learn sign language." <BR/><BR/>My mother followed those rules, because like many misguided parents, she thought the "experts" had to be right. But she has told me privately that if she had to do it all over again, she would have learned sign language, and now she tells new parents to do so.<BR/><BR/>My mother is currently battling cancer, and we just found out she has a nonoperable malignant tumor in her brain. Just a few days after we found out about this, several family members were all gathered at my mother's house. Everyone was sitting around chatting, and as the only Deaf person in a non-signing family, I was feeling left out. <BR/><BR/>I think my mom was feeling a little left out also... not because she couldn't hear, but it was just so overwhelming and confusing for her. Sitting on the sofa next to me, she reached over and silently grabbed my hand and squeezed it. <BR/><BR/>I will never forget the look on her face... it left me practically in tears. <BR/><BR/>I think she finally understood, and that touch was her way of an apology.Oceanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15783132510592587743noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-47560598935262633992008-05-16T21:28:00.000-04:002008-05-16T21:28:00.000-04:00http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-171381989...http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-1713819891112553773&hl=enbigmcreativehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16586776463384054430noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-88196676907423001422008-05-16T21:18:00.000-04:002008-05-16T21:18:00.000-04:00This comment has been removed by the author.bigmcreativehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16586776463384054430noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-15597107494788750612008-05-16T11:16:00.000-04:002008-05-16T11:16:00.000-04:00Barb Digi,What can I say :) ...... Look your high...Barb Digi,<BR/><BR/>What can I say :) ...... Look your high number goes bang!<BR/><BR/>DavyAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-11129854978460618622008-05-16T06:11:00.000-04:002008-05-16T06:11:00.000-04:00Thank you so much for having a real vlog between y...Thank you so much for having a real vlog between your grandma and yourself. I have said it in my own writing in DeafNotes about my grandmother who was 102 years old from the past years and said it the same thing, too.<BR/><BR/>I am NO difference from you except you have already set the language up from ASL when u were a baby because you have Deaf parents. That is a big help for you to have ASL from a start.<BR/><BR/>Anyway, my big family said they wish they have learned ASL a long time ago but they told them not to use ASL and make me to speak all the way that is not always success to have a real communication at home or outside of home. Also it slows us down to communicate with hearing people who don't bother to listen to us that is a real lack of communication all the way because we are having a deaf voice that doesn't motivate heairng people to listen to us that easily.<BR/><BR/>Anyway, MY grandmother said the same thing as your grandmother said it all along.<BR/><BR/>Guess what I got beaten up for saying it aloud about my grandmother / whole family and I myself about not having American Sign Language with me in DeafNotes.. <BR/><BR/>MIND YOU, These negative and bitter audist attitudes of Deafism, Audism and some CIsm especially CIsm, ALLDEAF, DEAFONLINE and DEAFREEDOM sites that sux to have a big cruel mocking about me and my being single mom for 20 years /grandmother as well. <BR/><BR/>Those people are being so self centered and doesn't really care for those Deaf children who wants to have a real communication between Deaf and Hearing. Scoffs at them in their future sake. NEVER MIND ABOUT our Deaf ears that will never solve anything.<BR/><BR/>Deaf will be always deaf forever that you need to face the Deaf reality. COPE WITH IT, no matter you like it or not.<BR/><BR/>ASL DOES EVERYTHING FOR BOTH SIDES especially for DEAF CHILDREN s rightful to have ASL in their life. SO BE IT!<BR/><BR/>Have a wonderful day. :)<BR/><BR/>SweetmindAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-11845172717169900602008-05-16T00:26:00.000-04:002008-05-16T00:26:00.000-04:00I am very touched with your warm comments!I wish I...I am very touched with your warm comments!<BR/><BR/>I wish I could respond to every one of you but I want to let you know that I am listening through my eyes to your heartbreaking stories as well. <BR/><BR/>I don't usually sign when using speech and I tend to keep two languages separate. For me to sign to my grandma would not help her to learn at this point because all those years, she had been mentally blocked to learn how to sign thanks to the influence of AG Bell. She often wished she could sign especially that she has three Deaf grandchildren (my siblings and me) and two Deaf great-grandchildren (my children). <BR/><BR/>I strongly encourage you to tape your family interview and perhaps someday, there will be a collection of video clips to make into a documentary DVD that will be passed out to all parents of Deaf babies. It will be an eyeopener indeed. Hugs!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05468248139421077835noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-16402742483426307832008-05-15T23:59:00.000-04:002008-05-15T23:59:00.000-04:00Barb... WOW! That's all I can say about your ass...Barb...<BR/> WOW! That's all I can say about your ass kickin' vlog!<BR/><BR/> You're not alone in this. I've been in the same shoes as you are. I could converse with my parents and grandparents without ASL. My parents told me that my oral deaf school told every parent not allowing their children to learn and/or use signs. Not even home made signs at all. But know what? My mom didn't listen to them and used home made signs with me because she noticed that I could understand her with home made signs while reading her lips as well. My late maternal grandparents on other hand used Italian gestures while talking, LOL. I'm able to talk and use home made signs with my mom and brother since they don't know ASL at all. I guess it is force of habit on both side just like it is for you and your grandma. <BR/><BR/>As for my husband, he went to same school as I. Exactly same thing with his parents who got the advice not to use signs. They eventually used the home made signs a little much later when they noticed that his siblings and neighbor kids used the home made signs with him. <BR/><BR/>The moral story is Deaf babies deserve to learn ASL while they can learn to talk if/when the parents want the total/sim communication. Also, most Deaf people can talk just fine without a help of C.I.<BR/><BR/>Thank you for the beautiful and touching vlog, Barb!<BR/><BR/>Misha :D<BR/><BR/>Barb, you and your grandma ROCK! ALL THE WAY!InsaneMishahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00006580280438059323noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-3964849519101409782008-05-15T22:09:00.000-04:002008-05-15T22:09:00.000-04:00Barbthank u for interviewing ur grandma, recording...Barb<BR/><BR/>thank u for interviewing ur grandma, recording it and sharing it with us all<BR/><BR/>it is priceless<BR/><BR/>please consider making a documentary and using this interview as part of it <BR/><BR/>ur family spans a long line of folks affected by the SYSTEM of Deaf education and its impact on people's lives<BR/><BR/>really see a great film in the making<BR/><BR/>years ago i saw Dr. Tucker give a presentation on Communication Abuse (what he termed for the denial of signing for a Deaf child) and there was a long line of folks wanting to share about their experiences growing up - similiar with Audism Unveiled - most folks talk about the home environment and the lack of access and the pain and want it causes for all parties involved<BR/><BR/>your grandmother rocks - in her firmness, her candor, and her integrity<BR/><BR/>i love how she rubs the table cloth with her fingers - as if her hands are still crying out wishing they could do more than just touch physical things - wishing the could touch Deaf eyes and hearts via signing <BR/><BR/>please make that documentary - even if it doesnt happen for a few years to come i know it will be from a Deaf perspective and EAGERLY awaited by all<BR/><BR/>thank u again for sharing Grandma A with us<BR/><BR/>peace<BR/><BR/>pattiDeaf Cinemahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12926229377327147931noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-77464217041168084292008-05-15T22:07:00.000-04:002008-05-15T22:07:00.000-04:00Barb-My aunt e-mailed me after watching your vlog....Barb-<BR/><BR/>My aunt e-mailed me after watching your vlog. She and I have gotten very close in the past few years. She will be 80 years old next month. She and I discussed on many issues. She learned some things from Deafread and I admire her for being open minded. She is hearing. I hope that hearing people who is against ASL will read her message here. <BR/><BR/>Penny- <BR/><BR/>That is great! That is exactly what happened with Mabel and Grandma - she was told to have Mabel use her voice and no signs. Fortunately even though Grandma didn't sign- there were homemade signs she made up and she was able to talk to Mabel with. It was wrong not letting the parents and siblings learn the sign language.<BR/><BR/>She didn't want me to learn sign language either, but Mabel taught me the alphabet so I could at least spell with her, plus our "crazy" home made signs. I think sometimes I still use some of the "old" home made signs and your Mom knows what I mean (lol)- she uses them with me to help me too. <BR/> <BR/>I didn't know they still did that. I thought they had advanced to using ASL. I was surprised to hear that. Thanks for the video honey. <BR/><BR/>ILY bunches Aunt BevAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-82824349123055012662008-05-15T21:30:00.000-04:002008-05-15T21:30:00.000-04:00Well presented! It strikes a chord in our emotion...Well presented! It strikes a chord in our emotional state and brought a lot of responses.<BR/>I was a product of oralism and a poster child back then (John Tracy Clinic and Clarke School) and it was a bad call on doctor's part!<BR/>Been a long time coming, it's time to ruffle those feathers and take action!<BR/>Gracias, mi amore'Longomanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02476200100015913365noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-32961164596316899912008-05-15T19:54:00.000-04:002008-05-15T19:54:00.000-04:00Absolutely brilliant. Brilliant beyond words (sig...Absolutely brilliant. Brilliant beyond words (signs). At the same time- I'm feeling a bit dejected at how history (AG Bell) is STILL repeating, repeating, repeating, repeating, and repeating. Feels like THE MATRIX trilogy.<BR/><BR/>Can't wait for the day when ALL babies, Deaf or hearing, SIGN fully and proudly. <BR/><BR/>AG Bell- just take your corporate profits and go away.DEhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00327393808859232220noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-25388684284826535862008-05-15T15:19:00.000-04:002008-05-15T15:19:00.000-04:00This vlog was absolutely superb, instantly one of ...This vlog was absolutely superb, instantly one of my favorites!Abbiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17272667052295179028noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-27468590719941713162008-05-15T14:47:00.000-04:002008-05-15T14:47:00.000-04:00Hi Barb,Your grandma's experience is common in my ...Hi Barb,<BR/><BR/>Your grandma's experience is common in my 'neck of the woods'(Wisc). Thanks for doing this interview! It gives me an idea:<BR/><BR/>This type of televised interview would make a GREAT public awareness ad during Deaf Awareness month or occasionally throughout the year. National and local chapters of Deaf Clubs, NAD, RID, Deaf Schools,etc. should do fundraising specifically to defray costs for television broadcasting of this kind of testimonial and interview. Families who need to get this info. will see it on t.v. and, if contact info. is included in the ad, families would have a resource and a connection!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-23333110823592857182008-05-15T14:23:00.000-04:002008-05-15T14:23:00.000-04:00Excellent vlog! Your vlog, AND the comments broug...Excellent vlog! Your vlog, AND the comments brought tears to my eyes. <BR/><BR/>Unfortunately, there will be AVT proponents who say this vlog is irrelevant because there were no CI back then, and nowadays children with CI do not need ASL. <BR/><BR/>Still, this vlog is an awesome tool to combat ignorance in the public. I'm going to share your link with other educators, and from there educate the Children Aid Society (Canadian version of CPS) workers who work with young deaf children. <BR/><BR/>Do I have your permission to do so? <BR/><BR/>ShelleyShelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01658793792301980725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-87995743002562005662008-05-15T14:14:00.000-04:002008-05-15T14:14:00.000-04:00Trying to go for another best vlog award? :-) Exc...Trying to go for another best vlog award? :-) Excellent one- your grandma was brave to get in front of the camera :-)<BR/><BR/>Good message to share with the rest of us!Jaredhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00540058054460624261noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-39412067773592977462008-05-15T13:43:00.000-04:002008-05-15T13:43:00.000-04:00Barb,This vlog presentation is REAL.It brought tea...Barb,<BR/><BR/>This vlog presentation is REAL.<BR/>It brought tears to my eyes.<BR/><BR/>It is the truth. These things are still happening today and yet, they (proponents of oralism) still preach the same to the parents of deaf children.<BR/><BR/>I'm happy you made this vlog and I look forward to seeing more people do such interviews with those who have seen and experienced such lies and deceit.<BR/><BR/>IT MUST BE REVEALED!!!<BR/>ASL is necessary.<BR/><BR/>I thank you for sharing this with all of us.<BR/><BR/>JeffreyAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-80695558708329070302008-05-15T13:13:00.000-04:002008-05-15T13:13:00.000-04:00Got to say, wow! Your grandma looks beautiful at t...Got to say, wow! Your grandma looks beautiful at that age! I understood her easily too!<BR/><BR/>Luckily for my mother, she was very stubborn when she found out the oral method wasn't working for me at age 2, as she had tried and tried.<BR/><BR/>School said NO. It was an oral program and mom refused to put me at MSD and fought with the school board. She learned sign language behind their backs, as well as a few teachers of the oral program. IMAGINE THAT!!! According to mom, it was "the top program" in Michigan - I'd have to double check with her to make sure.<BR/><BR/>A few teachers even saw how smart I was and agreed with my mom that sign language was the way to go, even though it was SEE at the time.<BR/><BR/>The teachers put their jobs on the line and fought the school board with my mom.<BR/><BR/>They won. It was turned into TC (not great, I know...but at the time it was a big deal considering my mom was only 19 years old!)<BR/><BR/>Anyway, your story is pretty common from what I've seen growing up with my classmates in TC program and outside as well.<BR/><BR/>Great vlog, Barb!IamMinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15337230366443001201noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-91096235213586873012008-05-15T12:57:00.000-04:002008-05-15T12:57:00.000-04:00OMG Joanne!!! (she's my oldest sister--Joanne from...OMG Joanne!!! (she's my oldest sister--Joanne from MA) im crying....I Love you & our family very very much...and thanks so much all of you for loving me & believing in me and US--the Deaf community!!! and again, Thankssss for the wonderful comment to help educating hearing parents/family...OXOXOXOAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-6258278129197425152008-05-15T12:53:00.000-04:002008-05-15T12:53:00.000-04:00Hi Barb!Wow this is excellent!!! this remind me my...Hi Barb!<BR/><BR/>Wow this is excellent!!! this remind me my late Grandma and Dad how much they believed in me!. I told them many times that oral didn't achieve my English writing and reading abilities. They knew it! and they think that AGBell Association are scam! they are evil greedy! I wish I have gone to Deaf School for sure my signing will be good as Pro ASL! I could gain more Deaf friends! oh well I guess I just accept few Deaf friends who accepted me as mild sign language.<BR/><BR/>My Grandma said to me that "Whenever you are happy, then Grandma is happy!" same for my Dad, he told me, I am very proud of you and I know you have many way with your communicate! doesn't have to be expert in speaking or using voice! I can understand you by your acting!" wow both Grandma and Dad understood! of course my Mom, current living, still support me too!! even I am gay, she still love me!! lucky I have wonderful Mother who accepted her gay and Deaf son.<BR/><BR/>so what you shared this with us, I got tear in my eyes!<BR/><BR/>I know Grandma and Dad up there are watching me and I often tell them "forgive me for silly act on my vlogs!" LOL!!!<BR/><BR/>Thank for sharing!<BR/><BR/>Gary BrooksAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37179429.post-65947467856443880312008-05-15T12:44:00.000-04:002008-05-15T12:44:00.000-04:00My name is Joanne. I'm 50 years old. I am hearin...My name is Joanne. I'm 50 years old. I am hearing and my sister Cheryl (Cheryl from MA) is deaf. I have 5 sisters, and 1 brother, we are all hearing. When Cheryl was 6 months old she got meningitis. It is believed this is how she lost her hearing. We cannot know for certain since it was not discovered that Cheryl was deaf until she was 18 months old and my parents began to suspect she was unable to hear. At first they brought her to see our family doctor, he stood behind Cheryl clapped his hands and proclaimed that she could hear because she turned her head. My parents persisted and finally it was arranged for Cheryl to have her hearing tested in Boston. That day my parents and Cheryl returned from the tests, heart-broken. They had no idea what it meant to have a deaf child. They were given no reassurances at the Hospital in Boston. They were just told your child is deaf. My parents wanted to do the very best for Cheryl but they did not find it easy obtaining information regarding what was best. At that time, more than 40 years ago, we were backward here in Massachusetts. My parents knew there must be something Cheryl needed to help her communicate with us. My grandfather knew a man who worked as the Superintendent of Schools in our home town. My grandfather approached this man and asked if there was a school for the deaf in our city. This man, looked at my grandfather and said, "Dick tell your daughter the best thing she can do with her little girl is to put her in an institution, she cannot learn, she is not normal and will never be normal." My grandfather a very quiet man was shocked and did not say anything, and then he left. He got back home and told my grandmother and she said, "and you said nothing to this man, why didn't you knock him to the ground, that child is brilliant anyone can see that looks into her eyes, how smart she is." Of course my parents would NEVER consider anything like this fool suggested. I write this story because it breaks my heart to realize that any progress made in understanding the importance of sign language, specifically ASL for deaf and hearing impaired people seems to be in jeopardy. We lost all those years communicating with Cheryl. She suffered, a bright child, unable to express her thoughts because we were told not to EVER use sign language with Cheryl. We were told we could not even use hand gestures when we spoke to her. Eventually Cheryl learned sign but didn't learn ASL until she was 14 years old. We as a family never took a sign language class, because we were advised against it even after Cheryl herself began to sign. We were told that Cheryl should sign with deaf people but with her hearing family we should continue to rely upon oral communication. It was not until I was 22 and went to school to learn ASL myself that I learned how impossible it was for my sister to have good communication with us, and us with her unless we used sign language. I think ASL is a beautiful language, it's like watching ballet. It's visually expressive and appealing. Unfortunately, I am not great at it, perhaps because I was so old by the time I took classes, I use ASL with Cheryl today, but it's not the fluency that I wished I could have. I resent those people that told us not to learn sign language. I resent all the times we have struggled with communication when Cheryl was young, and I resent the fact that I never became good enough to be an interpreter for Cheryl at large family functions. I am OUTRAGED to learn that things are going back to what I think of as the dark ages. To deny deaf children the use of ASL in schools is to deny them the best way for them to learn and FULLY communicate. Sign Language/ASL does NOT interfere with a deaf persons ability to read lips, or use oral communication, if anything it would IMPROVE on those skills. Please, any parents out there if you read this, please trust me when I say this. My sister Cheryl has two beautiful little girls. They are 5 and 6.5 yrs old, they have been signing since they were 9months old, probably understanding sign even before that. They spoke almost as young as they learned sign, every bit as well as the other children in my family, in fact, Cheryl's two girls are exceptionally bright and articulate. I'm so sorry if I have written more than I should, this is an emotional issue to me. Deaf people, children especially should NEVER BE DENIED THE USE OF ASL. It only makes it more difficult to communicate and does not help oral skills in any way. I'm very proud of my sister, she is intelligent, accomplished, a wonderful sister, daughter, wife and mother.Joanne in MAhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03723765713459619691noreply@blogger.com